I fell pregnant only 6 months after giving birth to my first child. I waited so long for a living child, I had experienced ten years of infertility and baby loss but was blessed with my rainbow baby in December 2016.

It was a very traumatic birth, not as I ever pictured birth to be.

I was induced 11 days after her due date, spent 14 hours in active labour, had a failed epidural, and after almost an hour of pushing my baby did arrive via episiotomy and forceps delivery.

The recovery was long and painful, and it was incredibly difficult to enjoy the first weeks being a new mum.

So, during the Summer 2017, you can imagine how scared I was to learn I was pregnant again. Absolutely terrified in fact! Because of past history we’d never thought of contraception, so my head was absolutely everywhere. I knew I needed more support than last time, so I thought I’d try One to One to get me through the pregnancy.

Even before my first appointment, I’d made the decision I’d be having an elective caesarean, I was not prepared to go through what I had again.

I met Tom during one of my early appointments and he asked if I’d like him to be my midwife. I agreed as he had a friendly calm approach to things and was very easy to talk to.

During our appointments he would chat to me about my anxieties, and about the option of home births. He was reassuring that things wouldn’t go the same way like with my first. I warmed up to the idea after researching home births and focusing on the positives and eventually decided that I’d give it a go!

Tom helped me prepare for the big day, informing me what I needed, and when I would have panic attacks thinking about the birth he would calm me down. Before I knew it, I was really excited to give birth! Then due date came and no baby…. days after I started to get anxious as induction would have to be an option, so a caesarean was back on my mind again and I was devastated. I called Tom on the Sunday afternoon and we arranged to try a sweep on the Monday and discuss our options. BUT early hours of Monday morning I woke up with strong period type pain and called Tom. I wasn’t sure if it was labour due to being induced and the PTSD I don’t remember. The pains were coming every few minutes, and I was panicking. Tom reassured me on the phone, its good it’s happening, and I’d be meeting my baby soon!

Tom arrived very quickly, and things were well on the way, I admit I was scared but it helped having him talk to me and explain what was going on. I listened to my body and Tom and within two hours of waking my daughter had arrived, in my home, with the sun shining through the windows. It was beautiful. No cold surfaces, medical devices, no people grabbing your baby and running around like headless chickens…. just a really calm atmosphere and Tom gave us all the time we wanted in those first precious moments.

What’s impressed me the most is how different I feel. I had slight graze and that’s pretty much it! And that’s after delivering a 9lb 3oz baby for the second time! I took a shower and it was like It never happened!

The support afterwards has been great too regarding feeding and routine checks.

I am utterly in debt to Tom and One to One.

You’ve changed my feelings toward pregnancy and birth into something positive.